Choices.

"Comparison is the thief of joy."

I've heard this so many times before. And it never really meant anything to me until recently. My last few posts have been about kind of where we are at in life and about being content (or trying to be anyway). So today might seem to piggyback on that topic, but I just really have some more thoughts on it. And I want to share them. So I will.  Because it's my blog ;)

Since becoming a mother, I've just been bombarded with choices. Even while pregnant it started. What to name our child. What doctor should I go to? Should I see a midwife? Well, what kind of birth do I want to have--natural or drugs? Or even a water birth. Well, am I going to breast or bottle feed? Should we vaccinate?

This continued as my husband and I went to register for things at Babies R Us. What kind of bottles? Bottle warmer? Nursing bra? Nursing cover? So many clothes! How many of these socks? What color sheets? Disposable or cloth diapers?

And even now it continues on. What brand of formula? What kind of baby food? Should I be making baby food at home? Should I use diaper rash cream? Should I be making my own baby wipes??

Whew. That's a lot of questions. I had/have never felt so overwhelmed or so unprepared. I'm so thankful to have options and to have the ability to choose how my husband and I want to raise our children. Sometimes maybe too many choices for me! But after a little break down in the middle of Babies R Us and a quick phone call to a dear friend of mine for reassurance, I think I'm a little more prepared for more and undoubtedly harder decisions down the road. 

Have any of you heard the term super mom? I sure have. And whoever this lady is, she's driving me nuts! How in the world does she have time to bake home-made cookies from scratch while doing laundry with her home-made laundry detergent and clean the house with her home-made cleaner and make a candle of fruit and paint a mural in the children's room and make a wonderfully healthy meal for dinner and organize every cabinet in her house and sew and a make other crafty things? Most days it's considered a success if my son takes a nap longer than 30 minutes so I can shower! So you can imagine how inadequate I felt most days after scrolling through Facebook and/or Pinterest and longing to be like these other wonder women.  

Maybe it's just me being over-sensitive, but I sure feel like there's this unspoken (or sometimes spoken) competition between moms. Or women in general, too. I think it may be a combination of having more access to all this information and having a means to share it via social media. (Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram, blogs..) And there is nothing wrong with having and using these things. I use all of them.

Actually, I'm taking a break from Pinterest these days for my own good. Trying to get past these insecurities I've been having...like do I have to be crafty/thrifty/homemaker/baker/chef to be a great mom? I tend to comprare myself to all these women and feel incredibly inadequate. Yes, of course I want to have a budget and use my resources and time wisely;  God has given me this life and these gifts.

We need to do it for the right reasons, though. To glorify God. Not be superior to others or to show off or to feel better about ourselves.  I'm not saying we shouldn't share our life. But one is not better than the other. Just different.

And here's the thing. God has given us all beautifully different talents and abilities. Even in church yesterday I was reminded of that. Not everyone is a pastor. Not everyone can sing. Not everyone can be a youth pastor. Use your gifts where they are needed.

In the bible study I am doing with some ladies from church, we are going through the book of James. It had us list our abilities/gifts that the Lord has given us. So I will do that here:

• I am a good listener.
• I am good at organizing. 
• I can write well.

Those are just a few. And I'm not trying to be vain, here, I hope you get that. There is a difference in being thankful and aware of the gifts you have without bragging about them or using them to one-up the people around you.

So all these questions about how to raise our children or what job is better are all secondary issues. Still decisions we have to make, but they are not life or death. Better or worse. We have what we are given from God. And it's all for the Kingdom.

"Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change." -- James 1:17